I watched a butterfly die today. It was a very strange experience.
For the first time in my life, I had the opportunity to just sit next to a butterfly and watch it be still. I really wanted to take advantage of this proximity and snap a few photos while I had the chance, but was torn about the intrusiveness and insensitivity of doing so as the little creature took its last breaths. I am sure it seems silly (and borderline PETA-activist-crazy) to many folks that I would worry about disrupting this one single butterfly when, in the grand scheme of things, I am responsible for causing far greater environmental harms. But I think this type of argument is misleading b/c it really confuses consciousness with responsibility- whether I am able to act responsibly and correct/avoid certain “bads,” should not negate my duty to be conscious of all that is “bad.”
Ultimately, I chose to take the photos and, as a result, must take responsibility for the impact of my decision. But, I also appreciate the rarity and honor of being able to capture the image of something so beautiful as it died.
I remember the time I saw an insect die. It was a shiny green California scarab beetle. Quite proud in fact. It must have known it was going to die. It crawled out of the cracks and stumbled upon itself, eeking out the last few crawls to a place where the morning sunlight was hitting our balcony ledge.
ReplyDeleteMy friend and I were watching all of this over some bloody marys that morning and did not say a word. Just watched intrigued as this creature, once so capable of bounding forth past anything, with strength hundreds of times its weight was finally coming to an end of its life.
The moment it finally went still was profound as if nature herself was giving one last sigh to this tiny soul. I looked at my friend and he looked at me at the same time as we broke from our gaze. Then we laughed HAHAHAHAHA STUPID BUG. and I kicked the damn thing off our ledge.
Starship troopers for life son.
HA. Too funny!
ReplyDeletePoor little bettle, though I doubt he died from the fall (or I secretly hope so).
At least you preserved its beauty for others to enjoy before it was all gone. It lives on in your pictures. Beautiful!
ReplyDeleteKhalajan
Thanks, Khalajan! I totally agree. Butterflies are so beautiful but, unfortunately, they only a for couple months after metamorphosis. So, while it was sad to watch it die, I am really grateful I had the opportunity to get so close to the little guy.
ReplyDelete